First off I need to ask someone to post the comments I got on my Homecoming entry...my stupid computer's blocking the page for some reason so I can't see them :( I wanna know what people saaaid! lol anyways, I'd greatly appreciate that
Now time for me to go down into the pits of my mind and be profound! First off is what we talked about in Sunday school today...but I have to admit, and it's not easy for me to do, I think any religious part of me is dying. I'm getting way too caught up in science that religion to me feels...just not true...I feel like religion and God was created in the human mind to help us all have something to live for. I feel like knowing someone'll be there to watch over you and hold you close when you cried and pick you up when you fall even when they're not physically there is a reason God was created. I feel like religion is simply our minds telling us what we want to hear...I know I'm probably wrong, and I know it's horrible that this part of me that was once so strong is dying, but try as I might I can't change it at the moment. I have so much more life left though, and I know it'll be full of suprises. Please, let me speak the truth, I don't want anyone to get mad at me for saying this or feeling this. I've been thinking long and hard about it all and I'm still constantly thinking about it and waiting for answers as I think. Either way we talked about the creation of the earth today in sunday school. Emily was getting sooo frusterated and annoyed because Steve, our teacher, was saying he believes in evolution and the big bang theory but he feels God is real and did have some control over it all...he said the little speck that blew up HAD to come from somewhere. I personally think we're missing something and blaming it on God because that's the easiest thing to do. Again, it's all opinion...and yet Emily just couldn't understand his reason. She feels everything in the Bible is right and we should all think that it is. She just couldn't let herself even THINK that these scientific facts and evidence are truly there and real. That's another difference in us...but then again I'm different from anyone else here, even from my family. It was an interesting topic but it was hard not to really say how I felt...I mean...being a pastor's daughter and saying, "I'm begining to lose faith in the exsistance of God" would be extremely shameful and wrong...and that part of me that refuses to let go and do what I want to is holding me back.
Second topic is an essay I wrote for english about the book Spite Fences. I'll post it here because it doesn't relate so much to the book as it does to modern day. I wish i could write essays like this all the time...and I'm thinking about doing so too, just for the fun of it. Anyways, it doesn't spoil anything I don't think for anyone who wants to read the book, but just please pay attention to what I was saying. It's not an easy topic and I could go on and on about it for a long, long time
until next time, I bid you goodbye,